Gratitude – Family Faith Companion

How I survived All Saints’ Day with help from an impenetrable fog

Posted on November 5, 2017February 23, 2019 by Carol Hulbert

The day’s first light disclosed a thick, soupy fog. My initial thought:
Drat! Another bleak, dreary day; so common in autumn around these parts.

The weather matched my mood.

A foggy day on the lake

How appropriate, I thought, for this to be my window-view…

On the day we celebrate “All Saints’ Day” in church – an event that I wasn’t sure I could handle.

But then…

(surprisingly)… upon closer scrutiny of the dark greyness…

I discovered…

amiable beauty in this somber landscape!

Curious coloration.
A softness to edges.
An almost mysterious misty-look.
Peaceful.

So what is All Saints’ Day (United Methodists? Celebrating Saints?)
and how does it relate to an impenetrable fog with uplifting elegance?

First, All Saints’ Day…

Actually occurs on November 1st but is celebrated on the first Sunday in November.
Got started for the Western church, around the 4th century, initially honoring those who had died, who had led holy, laudable lives for Christ. (Think of the capital-S-real-stuff Saints.)
Later expanded to include everybody – dead or alive! Anyone who has shared their faith; who has leveled the path before us. Often referred to as the great cloud of witnesses.
For United Methodists, “saints” are different than those in the Roman Catholic tradition. In the FAQ about what United Methodists believe, it clarifies our tenets on this matter.
Includes in particular remembering those who have died in the past year who were members of the congregation, and… well… those who were close to you who have recently left this earth.

The latter point ties the fog to the memory of saints.

I lost both my parents this past summer. Five weeks apart. I wasn’t ready to face (again) a remembrance of so-close, lost saints. (Are we ever?)

It has been hard. Sort of like being in a deep fog.

But then I remembered… As he receives the Ten Commandments, Moses goes up the mountain and “approached the thick darkness where God was.” Exodus 20:21.

Darkness can contain the presence of God.

The fog this morning was a reminder. In what could be seen as dreary darkness, when I looked closer, I found reason to give thanks for beauty. God was with me in my darkness.

Photo credits:
An as-it-was, un-retouched photo from my archives. Shared at Flickr; licensed under a Creative Commons (BY NC-SA 2.0).

Why you need a thanksgiving chair

Posted on November 26, 2015June 1, 2016 by Carol Hulbert

This Thanksgiving as you gather ’round the table, I’ll bet there will be a time for reviewing your gratitude. There likely will be lists. Every year we write ours on the table cloth.

There are the usual entries: Our health, our families, our friends, our homes, our stuff. Do we remember to add our skills and abilities; our talents?

Everything is a gift.

Yes, everything.

Even the hard things.

I wonder how the third servant in the Parable of the Talents felt, after he’d been lambasted by his master? Did he consider that a gift?

I wonder how our experience of misfortune can be changed if we consider it a gift?

Watch this short video. It’s powerful. It’s a reminder to always give thanks, for everything.

And to teach our children to do likewise.

(If reading this in an email, you can watch this video on YouTube.)

Happy Thanksgiving!

a blue line

Some of you have seen this before. Is it okay if I do a repeat? I’m using parts of a post I published two years ago… but this one is good. It’s worth the re-exposing. Thanks for grace.

~~ Carol

Video produced by Shift Worship.

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Purposeful Gratitude

Posted on November 21, 2013March 10, 2015 by Carol Hulbert

In reading the story of Abraham and Sarah, have you noticed that Abraham has a habit?

He stacks stones.

A very balanced pile of rocks

No, Abraham wasn’t piling rocks in an artful manner such as the photo above. He built altars. He deliberately heaped soil and rock, forming a reminder. A physical stalwart to remind him of an encounter with God. He would use these altars in his worship to God and to remind himself of God’s promises of blessing.

In the season of Thanksgiving, how about we be as deliberate, and make our gratitude be purposeful. The key is to make this your new normal. Here are some ways to do this with your family:

Why not pile some rocks. Go out for a walk to collect stones. Once back at home, in a family gathering (perhaps at the dinner table), read about Abram’s altar building in Genesis 12:6-8 or Genesis 13:3-4 or Genesis 13:18. Make a pile of your rocks naming each one as a thanksgiving to God.
Take the next step and write thanksgivings on your rocks with a permanent marker, or use a glue and water mix (Modge Podge) to apply cut out pictures to your rocks.
Allow your rock pile to be re-built on a daily basis!

A "shrine" of things that invoke the memory of God's goodness

The Life Application Bible tells us that Abram built altars to “remember that God was at the center of his life.” Build a different sort of “altar.” Fill a space in your home with reminders of thankfuls. Allow touching and rearranging and additions and subtractions. (Photo on right is at the Nelson home around Easter time.)

With older children discuss ways people often build “monuments” to themselves or to their stuff. Why do you suppose we do this? How can we break into a new focus of being grateful?

A blessing box - a place to store your blessings!

Fill up your family blessing box!
If your child didn’t get to make one in our Art Workshop for the story of Abraham & Sarah, you can view the lesson here and download the instructions here. Decorate any old box!

What are other ways your family makes gratitude purposeful?

Photo credits:
Balancing rocks by Viewminder, who licensed this photo on Flickr under a Creative Commons License. “Shrine” photo from the Nelson family. Used by permission. Blessing box photo from my archives.

Thank God! The world is a place where one can encounter God. (If we notice.)

Posted on November 21, 2012May 14, 2015 by Carol Hulbert

In this season of Thanksgiving, what are you thankful for?

My gratitude list includes the usual sorts of thankfuls, such as:

Greg’s pizza-oven-roasted potatoes.
Hearing about Lara’s “Best.Day.Ever.”
A text from Scott: safe arrival.
Lunch with a friend.

…To name just a few.

My list also includes hard things that seem difficult to be thankful for.

Tears at saying goodbye.
Facing change.
Mistakes, and more mistakes.

…Hard eucharisteo.

And then there are entries on my list of things that I should be thankful for every day… but I just forget.

That God has chosen me for my weaknesses. (My weakness amplifes my need for God.)
That God is always present with me! (Whether I sense him or not, he is a constant companion!)

…So easy to forget!

Perhaps we are all like Jacob who experiences God in his life and says,

Surely the Lord is in this place, and I was not aware of it.
Genesis 28:16

Our Cool Disciples story about Jacob and Esau is such a large story that we’ve broken it into two parts (part one and part two). With such a big story it is easy to loose sight of the main point. We could become embroiled in the details — who are all of the characters, and what happens, and in what order — which is important to know, but is not the most critical. Here is the point which we hope stands out:

God makes his presence known in our lives.

The world is a place where one can encounter God, reaching out to us.
If we take notice.

+++++++

As we head into the crazy-busy days ahead, can we make time to notice God? God seeks an encounter with us; God endeavors to get your attention!

For this I can say:

Thanks God!

Happy Thanksgiving
— Carol

Photo credits:
Photo of the Thanksgiving altar at church is from my archives.

I dare you to notice God at work

Posted on February 1, 2012May 14, 2015 by Carol Hulbert

Now that we are turning the calendar page to February, how are your New Year’s resolutions coming? I personally have already given up on daily exercise. (Such lofty thoughts!) There is one area however, where I am going full speed ahead: Noticing and counting God’s gifts.

I’m pursuing the “Joy Dare”

A real dare! It goes like this: in 2012 can I make a conscious effort to write down one thousand gifts? (That means roughly three a day!) These gifts are more than just things, they are graces from God.

Can I mark that many ways that God shows me love?

I’ve been writing down gifts for the last three years. But my annotations were intermittent. (It took me two years to get to 500.) Climbing to one thousand more in 2012 takes an effort! But this dare is aptly named: A Joy Dare, because I’m finding real joy even on days filled with chaos and confusion; I look for beauty in the ugly mess. It’s become for me a habit: repeatedly giving God praise – for everything.

Then it occurred to me that this tallying of thankfuls is a way to notice God in our lives! Exactly what we are trying to teach kids in our current Rotation on Moses.

It’s not too late to start this dare. Perhaps it could be reworded?

I dare you to notice God at work in your life.

Click on this button to find out more about the dare.

Some of my list (from its beginnings back in November 2008 but with up-to-date photos)…

a family gathering

6. A healthy family

11. Authentic refried beans

35. Blue sky days

a blue sky fall day

702. Texting blessings

279. Family discussion with tears

833. Smiles noted when someone unexpectedly lends a helping hand

1010. Foot pain

1013. A cheerleading friend.

Want to start this dare in your family but worried about where to find God’s graces? Might I point you to help? Click here for a wonderful list – a way to capture God’s gifts – three a day all through February!

Photo credits:
Photos are from my archives.
Button from onethousandgifts.com

An easy way to spend with God

Posted on November 22, 2011November 23, 2020 by Carol Hulbert

Thanksgiving is on the horizon; followed by Christmas… yikes! ’Tis the season for parents to be busier than ever, stressed out, worried, and cranky. Unfortunately, this rubs off on our kids. (Hopefully my kids won’t comment with too many past details!)

It is appropriate that this month the Cool Disciples are talking about ways to calm ourselves and balance our busy lives, so as to make time to be with God.

The kids are hearing that Jesus scheduled downtime into his life. He did lots of teaching and healing, but then he took time to pray to God. He also spent time with friends. Our Bible story for this Rotation is about Jesus’ visit to Mary and Martha’s house (Luke 10: 38-42) where he taught an important lesson about our priorities.

We’ve already talked about listening for God. But how do we make time to listen? How do we spend time with God?

Here’s an easy way: Start a gratitude journal.

Recording thankfuls opens the way to God.

Use this Thanksgiving holiday to start your list of thanks. Gather a notebook and a pen and set aside a time at least once a week (but why not every day?) to write at least five things the family is thankful for—gifts from God.

Might I suggest that you start off by setting a few family ground rules: Should the entries be numbered? Should the list be signed by whomever is making an entry? Are repeats okay?

Once your family practices daily gratitude, you’ll find that it brings benefits such as:

Better health,
Better sleep,
Less anxiety and less depression.

Read more about the research in The New York Times.

Best of all: Marking gratitude brings you closer to God.

Is your family keeping a gratitude list?

Here is a video of our story. (Created by the sixth graders in the Drama Workshop).

The story of Mary and Martha.

Photo credits…
Jesus at the home of Martha and Mary, by Harold Copping, via Wikimedia Commons in the Public Domain.

The password is thank you

Posted on August 22, 2011July 2, 2017 by Carol Hulbert

Is this Bible verse talking about the doors to church?

A church door

Enter his gates with thanksgiving, and his courts with praise.
Psalm 100:4

Time Out. Talk about… A speech bubble
Ask that question at the family dinner table. (Or wherever your family is gathered together.)

It happens that this month at Sunday’s Cool Rotation, we are studying Psalm 100. As we dig into this psalm with the kids, our primary focus is to explore what this tells us about how to worship God. After all, the Old Testament book of Psalms is a collection of poems, prayers, and hymns that were used in the worship services of the ancient Israelites.

When we reflect on “worship” we immediately think of what we do once a week on Saturday or on Sunday – opening up those gates (okay, the doors) and coming to church. We are commanded to worship God with loud, vocal praise.

Time Out. Talk about… A speech bubble Is worship restricted to just during a weekly “worship service”?

What if we consider those “gates” referred to above as “doors” to each new day of life? How does that change your outlook on worship?

If worship — expressing our love and our devotion to God — can take place at any time and in any place, then the teachings of Psalm 100 can be applied, not just once a week, but to daily life!

Time Out. Talk about… A speech bubble
What instruction does Psalm 100 impart to our day-to-day routine? Take a look at how the The Message paraphrases Verse 4 of Psalm 100:

Enter with the password: “Thank you!”
Make yourselves at home, talking praise.

Do you know what this means? We are to approach our days with gratitude!

The password to wondrous joy is given to us: put into practice saying thanks!

A couple of years ago I started the habit of noticing and noting things for which I am thankful; gifts from God. I got started after reading the thoughts of Ann Voskamp…

I find it helpful to keep a list.

Yes, it’s a numbered list. I’m working my way to 1,000, but I probably won’t stop there. Sometimes my list keeping is sporadic. But I always come back to realizing its benefits: it’s not enough to just think good thoughts, it takes feelings of true gratitude – seeing it all as gifts – in good times and in bad.

Some recent entries in my gratitude list…

711. A husband who gets groceries.
728. Having something to do while I’m waiting.
735. A son’s smile when I give him a blessing.
743. A job (in her field!) for my daughter.
746. Wild, free-for-the-picking flowers to bring in for the table.
748. An out-of-the-blue: “I’m coming over to help.”
760. Having a mess to clean-up.
789. Tears at saying good-bye.
798. Sheets flapping on the clothes line.
811. Reflecting on a weekend with wonderful women surrounding me as I stepped outside my comfort zone, multiple times!

What about you? Have you considered starting a list of thousands (and thousands) of gifts?

Photo credits:
Church doors by Jimmy Harris, who licensed this photo on Flickr under Creative Commons (CC BY 2.0).
Button from A Holy Experience.
Rest of photos from my archives.

Practicing Gratitude

Posted on June 27, 2011April 19, 2019 by Carol Hulbert

When someone gives you a gift, what is the standard, considered-good-manners, expected response?

(Everyone say it all together…)

Thank You!

Unfortunately, kids aren’t born knowing how to be thankful.

Now, I know. You are well-aware of your parental requirement to teach your children manners. (Please, thank you, you’re welcome, and the rest).

How about training them to have a grateful heart?

A thankful heart shown in chalk

Need an ingress to this topic? Our June Rotation offers an appropriate Bible story. We’ve been studying the “Widow’s Offering” from Mark 12:41-44.

We’ve already learned that gifts given to God are called offerings. Our offerings can be time, talents, or money.

We’ve also learned that the woman in our story could have given everything she owned (two, small coins!) out of trust that God would provide for her needs.

What about the possibility that the poor widow gave because she was grateful?

For the widow in our story, it probably wasn’t her first time giving an offering. She was likely in the habit.

Perhaps we need to practice being thankful.

Here are some ways…

Set up a place for praises. In a noticeable location, place a stack of papers and a pen near a basket or a bowl. (Or post a list on the refridge; or give everyone their own journal.) Encourage everyone to draw or write about things that make them grateful. Once a week ponder your collection.
Write notes to your family (the lunch box, posted on the car dash, on the mirror, saying, “Right now, what are you thankful to God for?” Expect a report at the dinner table.
While driving around town allow a certain happenstance (every dog seen or every blue car) to spark the announcement of a grateful.
Use this mealtime grace: Thank you for the world so sweet. Thank you for the food we eat. Thank you for the birds that sing. Thank you, God, for everything. Follow it up with everyone naming a gratitude.
Write short thank-you notes to people who might appreciate a little thanks. Folks at church – such as the person who sang a solo, the person who rocked babies in the nursery, or the pastor; in your neighborhood – the person who lets you pick flowers, or always bags your groceries. The possibilities are endless!